Sunday, 22 August 2010

Not educational just plain old family fun! - by Dea Birkett

Prince of Cringe at the Gilded Balloon was gross, absolutely gross. The prince sucked a long thin balloon up his nostril and pulled it out through his mouth. He walked on 48 raw eggs, smashing htem between his toes. He banged a nail through is nose. I can’t recommend it highly enough, especially for nine-year-old boys like mine.

And our day just went from disgusting to very disgusting. After Prince of Cringe we saw The List Operators for Kids in the Pleasance Courtyard. I’m a list writing addict. I can barely move in the morning until I’ve written a list of the things I have to do for that day. So I thought this show would be for me as well as the nine-year-old twins. I was right. Double act Matt Kelly and Richard Higgins began by throwing pooey knickers into the audience. They constructed the world’s ultimate sandwich – slabberings of ketchup, jam, honey, crisps, mustard, marmite, and a gherkin. Then they ate it. We threw aliens made out of dishtowels at the Matt and Richard for no reason whatsoever. In return they vomited green paint over us. There was more farting than after an auntie’s tea. There’s nothing like a fake fart to get kids giggling uncontrollably, well mine at least.

It was the best time we’ve had together for ages because, unlike every other family activity now offered including on the Fringe, it wasn’t remotely educational. It didn’t try to turn me into a quasi-teacher explaining things to my kids every two seconds in soft mummyish whisperings. We didn’t discover how gravity works or beef up on the effects of global warning, not even in an amusing way. I didn’t come out with anything new except a face that ached from laughing so much. We had a great afternoon. We learnt absolutely nothing. We just had fun.

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